How You Really Found Me

12 Jul


Am sitting here on “lunch,” sipping my red eye (black coffee with a shot), eating what will (I’m sure) equal an entire cereal box worth of Rice Krispy treats, sent special delivery from Aunt and Uncle G, am listening to bad 90’s music that I love, and Naughty Girl has finally arrived from China.

…Not bad, as workdays go.

Tonight, we have our last Friday performance of “Earnest” as the Black Lab team begins their Seattle 48 Hour Film Fest without about half it’s last year members.  (A classic, on-your-feet, guerilla write-film-and-edit campaign of creative awesomeness.)  We wish them well from our various places on the planet…and will try not to feel guilty as we climb into bed tonight, (at whatever-dark-thirty), which is still more sleep than they will be seeing until about this time on Monday.

…Kill it, guys!!!

Meanwhile, it’s been a bit since I checked up on the full arena of blog stats here for SWAL.  Never did get around to writing that all-inclusive First Year BD post I was thinkin’ on…and lets be real, by this point I won’t ever be.  Still like to look in and see how the numbers and things are running though…and one of my all-time favorite bonuses is the “Search Term” list…that is: how people not on FB or WordPress, found me to begin with.

…That’s right, I know all your dirty secrets, you little freaks.  Yes.  I’m talking to YOU, “Consumer Fury” and “Redheaded Girl Feet.”

…But I won’t tell. 

…Except for right here. 

…But after that, I swear I won’t even whisper a word.

Some of my current favorite hits include (word-for-word):

“bar talk blogs”
“nerd girl pin up”
“I’m not bossy I just have better ideas”
“dame wars”
“sneezing+feet fetish”
“Drag Queen makeouts”
“gollum theatre cups”
“PMS monster”
“hyperbole and metaphors slandering women in much ado about nothing”
“mae west fish”
“wine, pamprin and Breakfast @ Tiffany’s”
“downton fucking abbey”
“nice lesbian couple”
“circus porn”
“cooking torture”
“will and grace drinking game”
“welcome to the den of iniquities”
“Accidental asshole”
“rat pack boys and pin up girls theme party”
“the musicality of sentence structure”
“de-motivational posters boob”
“weightlifting girl postcards”
“gamer rage”
“the butt bio”
“my work in brothel”
“exercising demons”
“just checking cat email”
“marvel comic wedding toppers”
“people dressed as rag dolls”
“quality stalking”
“hell traffic”
“ode to my bed”
“mini hypochondriac”

…Of course, no matter how much I wanna point fingers and make fun of you, I know exactly which post(s) you were ultimately taken to, nine times outta ten, simply by your word combo.  So who is the joke really on?

…I vote: still you.  Because I gained readership in the end.


…But seriously.  “Just checking CAT email?”

You lost me.



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