Archive | 2:52 pm

Death Of Keurig

10 Oct


My Keurig exploded this morning.

…Well, actually it was more like it pooped chunks.  I knew it was all gonna go south when it took me two minute to clamp the cup in so the water lid would pop up.  The clamp wouldn’t stick.  Kept swirling the cup canister dealy-boop that lets you put whatever fresh grounds you want in it…but the lip musta been off or something on the top, because clamping was just not happening.

…And reasoning didn’t help at all.  Threats either.

Finally I managed to shove it all together, popped the “go” button, and shuffled back to bed to sit out the perk time, while staring into oblivion and contemplating the effort of keeping my eyes both open simultaneously. After the final colicy burps and hisses announced completion in the other room, I shuffled back to the kitchen to find coffee ground diarrhea leaking all down the sides of the Keurig and cup and onto the counter top.  Only about half of the liquid-ground mixture actually made it into the mug, which I blinked at with a sigh. 

…This is where tea strainers come in handy.

…Grabbing another mug, I glopped the mixture through a strainer into it, losing more along the counter and floor for my efforts, and then just left it all sitting there as I brought my two inches of coffee left to the cause, with me to the shower.

In the best of cases, mornings and I aren’t friends. This one seemed to pre-doom itself from the beginning, but then calmed down to something more manageable later in the day. It’s only fair really, when you start out that pathetically.

…And now, the first time I’ve been able to take a break for the day, I’m only one hour out from calling it here at the office, and going home. A clammy walk in misty fog will be my next challenge for the day, followed then by four hours of Act One review at rehearsal. Somewhere in there: more line runnings, the manufacturing and eating of “dinner,” and fixing of the Keurig…so we can relive it all again tomorrow.

I’m game.

…It’s totally gonna be fine as soon as I start moving again and pretend like my ass isn’t just permanently affixed to this swivel chair with a phone glued to my ear.

…Fifty more minutes, friends. Only just fifty more.

Even I can do that.


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