In The Hood

3 Sep

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I’ve decided to take you on a walk with me today. 

…I’ll point out some stuff along the way, while you feel jealous because when you go on walks, you stay in your neighborhood, but when I go on walks, almost every building I pass by takes me to a totally new location in the world, and/or historical point of time.

For instance we have the English Cottage.  The wisteria-draped front door, and combination of manicured topiary enhanced lawn has no idea it is actually planted in the Pacific Northwest.   
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…But it shouldn’t feel bad about it…because this house thinks it’s in Greece.  I defy you to change it’s mind on that point.
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Here, we have our very own version of the Winchester Mansion, in that the people who live here never seem to think the place is big enough, so have continued to grow it in various directions for years now.
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…Meanwhile, this is where the Hobbits live when they move away from The Shire.
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…And this place thinks it is the starring feature of all of the Bronte novels.
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We have an actual Psycho house up on the hill…(and yes, those are mounted camcorders pointing at you.)
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We have ethnic diversity who live here, and brought the primary colors Crayola box with them.  (As a representative of said peoples, can I just ask: wtf is with the bitch-slap-you brightness of our buildings, people?)
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…There is the place that thinks it’s an English hunting lodge.
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…The one that wants to be a castle when it grows up.  (Turrets anyone?)
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…The one who thinks its in Nantucket.
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…And the one they stole out of a Dickens novel. (I give you: the place where Miss Havisham lives.)
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One of many representatives from the D.C. crowd is shown here.
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“Welcome to New England,” might as well be posted on a flag outside this door.
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This claims it’s in the Hollywood hills, circa 1920.
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And, this one actually thinks it’s the White House.
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Hey…you could move to the Mediterranean OR save your money and just pretend to, by living here.
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You can go back in time and live in this original Mike Brady design.
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Have coffee of the future.
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Eat in the 50’s.
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…Default to the Victorian.
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…Visit the Hogwarts stand-in.
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…Frequent the 40’s drugstore (that still makes deliveries)
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…Relocate to Spain.
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…Move in with the modern-day Flintstones.
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…Or, masquerade as an eternal Frat Houser.
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This is all within one giant loop of my own little home. Which I think you can agree ain’t bad for a couple mile radius that could fill an entire passport, and break some serious time-continuum laws. Not bad at all.

~D

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