Beethoven in the background.
…I’ve just finished beating the hell outta my giant pink-bubble-gum Pilates ball, (with some added Yoga), and am celebrating my efforts with a heavy-handed homemade margarita that tastes about 200 proof.
…I am not a greener, you guys. If I’m expected to work out, there must be some give and take, here.
Besides…I already did like a five mile beach walk today at Point Defiance. Plus rehearsal. Plus walked the mall. So it’s not like I haven’t earned this five-stiff-drinks-in-one.
An excellent day off.
Slept until 10:30 (which is totally unheard of, especially where cramping is concerned.)
…Lazed about a bit, regrouped over coffee, motored to mall to get nails done while watching Streep be magnificent in “Devil Wears Prada” in the background. Then: did some summer shirt-shopping, off to beach-walk, had a sandwich, did lines and scene work at rehearsal, and beat it over to Barnes and Noble, till they kicked me out.
Home to working out with the giant pink-bubble-gum ball…to the tunes of Glenn Miller. (It totally works, and makes it all a lot less horrible.)
…Debated more De Profundis. Decided to blog first.
After all that lightness and air and incidental flippancy, I want a little more grounded heft.
I like heft.
I love Beethoven.
I blame him (almost exclusively) for my total closet devotion to doomed unrequited love stories.
…Well, him and the Brontes.
Sometimes you just need some background yearning.
…He also makes me want to “make” something. Mostly, write. He makes me want to push aside these trivial little blog posts I’ve been devoted to for nigh onto a year now, and make something really legitimate. Something dark or irksome or full of complications. Not even in content, even just in sentence structure, and thought process. Haven’t done that in so long, I’ve forgotten how.
…But then I’ll hear the beginning of a movement…and I’ll see the picture of thought he paints instantly in my brain. And how immediate the feelings follow it, and how personal and intimate it becomes. And I start to remember how much I loved writing like that. As if it mattered. Not just for a lark.
…Back when it was about “content” not just daily requirement.
Art comes in so many varieties. And the influence of one on another, is like a waterfall affect with me.
De Profundis…such a serious text and consideration on the responsibilities of what it means to be an “artist” and the accountability that comes with it, is obviously pushing me in that mindset as well. Delving into Oscar by day, in all his ridiculous and delicious glory, then investing in his darker side at night, is this whole new combining experience that makes me want to explore the same in my own little creationary world.
…There is obviously room for both.
So, tonight is Beethoven, and some prose maybe.
Supremely rusty on that bent, but it’ll come back to me.
Off for a try at least…